Breaking up: it's a matter of life or death

Trevor Davis

It's a bad time for me at the moment – I'm currently recovering from being dumped. Four weeks have slipped by in the blink of an eye and it feels like she's dropped those timeless lexical love bombs: "Look, it's just not working… it's not you, it's me."

Well that wasn't much compensation, my love has now died and I'm suffering from a broken heart.

And new research says that this is as serious a physiological problem as it is an emotional one. Scientists from Glasgow University claim that it is possible to die from a broken heart.

They found that there is a disproportionately high risk of death from any cause in the first six months after a spouse died and a higher risk of heart disorders in the first five years.

Even when other risk factors such as smoking and genetic diseases were taken into account the threat remained.

Now my Julie may not be dead by she might as well be so to me – leaving me very vulnerable from being six foot under within a year apparently.

Cathy Ross, of the British Heart Foundation, told the BBC that the common ways of coping with the death of partner often leads to health problems.

"Some people will smoke more, other people may drink more and they tend not to eat - or to eat really badly.

"It is really about how we cope with the bereavement, rather than the process itself."

However, a study released earlier this year shows that while the emotional impact of losing a loved one does indeed has a significant impact on one's emotional and physical health, it begins to decline over time.

The Yale Bereavement Study found that "acceptance increased steadily through the study observation period ending at 24 months post-loss".

Dr Paul Maciejewski from Yale University School of Medicine added: "Regardless of how the data are analysed, all of the negative grief indicators are in decline by approximately six months post-loss.

"The persistence of these negative emotions beyond six months is therefore likely to reflect a more difficult than average adjustment and suggests the need for further evaluation of the bereaved survivor and potential referral for treatment."

So it appears that there's light at the end of the tunnel. As long as I can ride out this wave of potential death for another 23 months, I should be okay. That is a long time of trying to ward off the Grim Reaper but I think I can do.

Science depends solely on rationality and analysing empirical evidence and so I think I have a plan. If losing a partner increases your risk of dying, then surely getting a new girlfriend should help to cancel out this risk. Now for a quick dose of the Rebound Pill…