Dump him after two years or be fat!

By Catherine Portland


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After If you love your waistline more than your bloke, then ditch him before your second anniversary, otherwise you might need to go up a dress size.

This advice doesn't come from personal experience, although I have friends that have ballooned with domestic bliss. A poll by Goldshield Healthcare, which - surprise, surprise - produces slimming pills, reveals that two-thirds of Britons say their partners put on weight in the first 24 months of a relationship.

It seems that it is less of a seven-year itch and more of a two-year bloat.

More worryingly, the poll revealed that three-quarters of people would stop fancying their partner if they put more weight on.

So why do we suddenly stop caring about our figures when Mr Right comes along?

Psychologist Dr Glenn Wilson at King's College, London, explains that some people stop caring about their appearance once they've snared a partner. Meanwhile, single people just have to work hard and stay sexy to hook up in the first place.

He said: "Body weight is an important aspect of attractiveness. Many couples feel so complacent about their relationship that they let their figure slip.

"Perhaps they have been on a strict regime of diet and exercise but once they feel that they have 'hooked' their partner, less of an effort is made to remain attractive."

He added that once the pounds have started to pile on, it can be difficult to stop them and reverse the process, especially with a million and one temptations.

So what to do if you're happy hooked up and suddenly you look down and can't see your feet?

Well, you could change your diet, drink less, take up a sport - maybe in true sickly couply fashion you could do those things together - and focus on the body beautiful. But if you do this, you have to remember that all the hours spent sweating at the gym mean time away from your bloke. Therefore, if you aren't with him enough as you have to focus on fitness, you may as well dump him altogether anyway.

Another route to go down is to just dump him first off. After the initial break-up and the pounds gained through necessary biscuit, chocolate and ice cream consumption, the need to hook a man will see you losing the weight to increase your pulling ability.

There are some that say love will see beyond looks and a true match will see you for who you are, no matter how many chins you have. What utter rubbish! All my friends are either thin and single and popping between beaus - no doubt using bed hopping to burn calories - or fat in a long-term relationship.

It's simple, if you want to be happy in a relationship accept a bigger dress size and being accused of having a good personality. If you want to look sexy and slim forevermore, accept dying as a spinster.

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